Imponderables: Fun and Games Read online

  Collins gem

  Imponderables®:

  Fun and Games

  David Feldman

  Contents

  Introduction

  Why are rented bowling shoes so ugly?

  Why does Mickey Mouse have four fingers?

  Why do quarterbacks call the snap with the exclamation “Hut”?

  Why are the commercials louder than the programming on television?

  Why is the NBA shot clock 24 seconds?

  Why do golf balls have dimples?

  Why were Athos, Porthos, and Aramis called The Three Musketeers when they fought with swords rather than muskets?

  Why are the Notre Dame sports teams called “The Fighting Irish” when the school was founded by French Catholics?

  In movies and television dramas, what is the purpose of boiling water when babies are delivered at home?

  Why is there a dot on billiards and pool cue balls?

  Why is comic strip print in capital letters?

  Why do men’s bicycles have a crossbar?

  Why is the scoring system in tennis so weird?

  Why do place kickers and field-goal kickers get yardage credit from where the ball is kicked and yet punters only get credit from the line of scrimmage?

  Why don’t disc jockeys identify the titles and artists of the songs they play?

  Why is the home plate in baseball such a weird shape?

  How do figure skaters keep from getting dizzy while spinning? Is it possible to eye a fixed point while spinning so fast?

  What is the emblem on the Pittsburgh Steelers’ helmets? And is there any particular reason why the Pittsburgh Steelers are the only NFL team to have their logo on only one side of their helmets?

  On Jeopardy! what is the difficulty level of the daily doubles supposed to be?

  Why are new CDs released on Tuesdays? Why aren’t new books released on a particular day?

  Why do hockey goalies sometimes bang their sticks on the ice while the puck is on the other end of the rink?

  Why does Monopoly have such unusual playing tokens?

  Why is there a two-minute warning in American football?

  Who was Casper the Friendly Ghost before he died?

  Why do rinks use hot water to resurface the ice?

  What is the circle adjacent to the batter’s box on baseball fields?

  Why are copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numerals?

  Why are downhill ski poles bent?

  Why do females tend to throw “like a girl”?

  Why don’t magazines put page numbers on every page?

  Why do magazine and newspaper editors force you to skip pages to continue an article at the back of the magazine/newspaper?

  Why do basketballs have fake seams? Do they have a practical purpose or are they merely decorative?

  In baseball scoring, why is the letter “K” chosen to designate a strikeout?

  How do football officials measure first down yardage with chains, especially when they go on field to confirm first downs?

  Why have many movie theaters stopped popping their own popcorn?

  Why do golfers yell “Fore” when warning of an errant golf shot?

  Why are tennis balls fuzzy?

  Where is Donald Duck’s brother?

  Do fish really bite more when it is raining?

  Why are television sets measured diagonally?

  Why are the uniforms of professional Japanese baseball players printed in English letters and Arabic numbers?

  Which side gets the game ball when a football game ends in a tie?

  Why was he called the Lone Ranger when Tonto was always hanging around?

  What did Barney Rubble do for a living?

  Why are there eighteen holes on a golf course?

  How do the networks sell advertising time when live programs run longer than scheduled?

  Why are racquetballs blue?

  Why don’t barefoot field goal kickers and punters get broken feet?

  Where do they get that awful music for ice skating?

  Where do they get that organ music in skating rinks?

  Why doesn’t countdown leader on films count all the way to one?

  In baseball, why is the pitcher’s mound located 60’6” from home plate?

  Why do they need twenty mikes at press conferences?

  What is Goofy?

  Is Goofy married? If not, where did television’s Goofy, Jr., come from?

  Why do the Oakland Athletics’ uniforms have elephant patches on their sleeves?

  How are the subscription insert cards placed in magazines?

  What is that sniffing noise boxers make when throwing punches?

  What does “legitimate” theater mean? Where can you find “illegitimate” theater?

  When running into the dugout from his defensive position, why is the first baseman thrown a baseball from the dugout?

  Why are baseball dugouts built so that they are half below ground?

  Why do the back wheels of bicycles click when you are coasting or back pedaling?

  Why do mis-hits of golf shots, especially irons, sting so badly and for so long?

  Why are there two red stripes around the thinnest part of bowling pins?

  Why was Charles Schulz’s comic strip called Peanuts?

  Where is the Donkey in Donkey Kong?

  Who are all those people on the sidelines during American football games?

  Why are the Muppets left-handed?

  How did the football get its strange shape?

  Help!!!

  About the Author

  Copyright

  About the Publisher

  INTRODUCTION

  * * *

  All of us are afflicted by mysteries of everyday life that drive us nuts. I’ve devoted the last twenty years of my life to writing books that attempt to eradicate this plague. In the ten Imponderables® books, a mystery about sports (Why does a football have such a crazy shape?) is likely to be next to one about animals (Why don’t we ever see baby pigeons?) or business (Why are grocery coupons worth 1/100 of a cent, and does anyone ever really redeem them?).

  The good folks at Collins suggested lumping all the previously published sports and games Imponderables together for this Gem edition, and as a sports fan (OK, fanatic), I jumped at the chance. With a few exceptions, the text is unchanged from the original editions; in a few cases, we updated material that would have otherwise been confusing or outdated.

  Almost all the questions in this book came from readers. Besides the release of psychic stress, the first to pose each mystery received a free, autographed copy of the book. Do you have any Imponderables hounding you, about sports or any other subject? You can be rewarded, too. Come join us on the Web at www.imponderables.com, e-mail us at [email protected], or if you must resort to the Imponderable institution known as the United States Postal System, write to us at:

  Imponderables

  P.O. Box 116

  Planetarium Station

  New York, NY 10024-0116

  WHY ARE RENTED BOWLING SHOES SO UGLY?

  * * *

  We know that taste in art is a subjective matter.

  We are aware that whole books have been written about what colors best reflect our personalities and which colors go best with particular skin tones.

  But on some things a civilized society must agree. And rented bowling shoes are ugly. Does anybody actually believe that maroon-blue-and-tan shoes best complement the light wood grain of bowling lanes or the black rubber of bowling balls?

  Bruce Pluckhahn, curator of the National Bowling Hall of Fame and Museum, told us that at one time “the black shoe—like the black
ball—was all that any self-respecting bowler would be caught dead using.” Now, most rented bowling shoes are tricolored. The poor kegler is more likely to be dressed like Courtney Love (on a bad day) than Walter Ray Williams.

  We spoke to several shoe manufacturers who all agreed that their three-tone shoes were not meant to be aesthetic delights. The weird color combinations are designed to discourage theft. First, the colors are so garish, so ugly, that nobody wants to steal them. And second, if the rare pervert does try to abscond with the shoes, the colors are so blaring and recognizable that there is a good chance to foil the thief.

  Of course, rented bowling shoes get abused daily. A bowling proprietor is lucky if a pair lasts a year. Gordon W. Murrey, president of bowling supply company Murrey International, told Imponderables that the average rental shoe costs a bowling center proprietor about $25 to $50 a pair. The best shoes may get rented five hundred times before falling apart, at a very profitable $2 per rental.

  Even if rentals were a dignified shade of brown, instead of black, tan, and red, they would get scuffed and bruised just the same. Bowlers don’t expect fine Corinthian leather. But can’t the rented bowling shoes look a littler classier, guys? Isn’t a huge 9 on the back of the heel enough to discourage most folks from stealing a shoe?

  Submitted by Shane Coswith of Reno, Nevada.

  WHY DOES MICKEY MOUSE HAVE FOUR FINGERS?

  * * *

  Or more properly, why does Mickey Mouse have three fingers and one thumb on each hand? In fact, why is virtually every cartoon animal beset with two missing digits?

  Conversations with many cartoonists, animators, and Disney employees confirm what we were at first skeptical about. Mickey Mouse has four fingers because it is convenient for the artists and animators who have drawn him. In the early cartoons, each frame was hand-drawn by an animator—painstaking and tedious work. No part of the human anatomy is harder to draw than a hand, and it is particularly difficult to draw distinct fingers without making the whole hand look disproportionately large.

  The artists who drew Mickey were more than happy to go along with any conceit that saved them some work. So in Disney and most other cartoons, the animals sport a thumb and three fingers, while humans, such as Snow White and Cinderella, are spared the amputation.

  And before anyone asks—no, we don’t know for sure which of Mickey’s fingers got lopped off for the sake of convenience. Since the three nonthumbs on each hand are symmetrical, we’d like to think it was the pinkie that was sacrificed.

  Submitted by Elizabeth Frenchman of Brooklyn, New York.

  Thanks also to R. Gonzales of Whittier, California.

  WHY DO QUARTERBACKS CALL THE SNAP WITH THE EXCLAMATION “HUT”?

  * * *

  Put men in a uniform. Give them a helmet. And they all start speaking alike. At least, that’s what all of our football sources claimed. Pat Harmon, historian at the College Football Hall of Fame, was typical:

  In Army drills, the drill sergeant counts off: “Hut-2-3-4.” He repeats “Hut-2-3-4” until the men get in right. Football language has copied the drill sergeant.

  We’ll have to believe our football authorities, since no evidence exists that the “hut” barked by quarterbacks has anything to do with little thatched houses.

  In fact, “hut” wasn’t always used as the signal. Joe Horrigan, of the Pro Football Hall of Fame, sent us a photocopy of a section of the 1921 Spalding’s How to Play Football manual that indicates that perhaps we aren’t as hip as our forbears:

  When shift formations are tried, the quarterback should give his signal when the men are in their original places. Then after calling the signal [he] can use the word “hip” for the first shift and then repeat for the players to take up their new positions on the line of scrimmage.

  Our guess is that the only important virtue of “hut” is that it contains one syllable.

  Submitted by Paul Ruggiero of Blacksburg, Virginia.

  WHY ARE THE COMMERCIALS LOUDER THAN THE PROGRAMMING ON TELEVISION?

  * * *

  Having lived in apartments most of our adult lives, we developed a theory about this Imponderable. Let us use a hypothetical example to explain our argument.

  Let’s say a sensitive, considerate yet charismatic young man—we’ll call him “Dave”—is taking a brief break from his tireless work to watch TV late at night. As an utterly sympathetic and empathic individual, “Dave” puts the volume at a low level so as not to wake the neighbors who are divided from him by tissue-thin walls. Disappointed that “Masterpiece Theatre” is not run at 2:00 AM, “Dave” settles for a rerun of “Hogan’s Heroes.” While he is studying the content of the show to determine what the character of Colonel Klink says about our contemporary society, a used-car commercial featuring a screaming huckster comes on at a much louder volume.

  What does “Dave” do? He goes up to the television and lowers the volume. But then the show comes back on, and “Dave” can’t hear it. Ordinarily, “Dave” would love to forgo watching such drivel, so that he could go back to his work as, say, a writer. But he is now determined to ascertain the sociological significance of “Hogan’s Heroes.” So for the sake of sociology, “Dave” gets back up and turns the volume back on loud enough so that he can hear but softly enough not to rouse the neighbors. When the next set of commercials comes on, the process is repeated.

  Isn’t it clear? Commercials are louder to force couch potatoes (or sociological researchers) to get some exercise! When one is slouched on the couch, adjusting the volume of the television set constitutes aerobic exercise.

  Of course, not everyone subscribes to our theory.

  Advertising research reveals, unfortunately, that while commercials with quick cuts and frolicking couples win Clio awards, irritating commercials sell merchandise. And it is far more important for a commercial to be noticed than to be liked or admired. Advertisers would like their commercials to be as loud as possible.

  The Federal Communications Commission has tried to solve the problem of blaring commercials by setting maximum volume levels called “peak audio voltage.” But the advertising community is way ahead of the FCC. Through a technique called “volume compression,” the audio transmission is modified so that all sounds, spoken or musical, are at or near the maximum allowable volume. Even loud rock music has peaks and valleys of loudness, but with volume compression, the average volume of the commercial will register as loudly as the peaks of regular programming, without violating FCC regulations.

  The networks are not the villain in this story. In fact, CBS developed a device to measure and counterattack volume compression, so the game among the advertisers, networks, and the FCC continues. Not every commercial uses volume compression, but enough do to foil local stations everywhere.

  Of course, it could be argued that advertisers have only the best interests of the public at heart. After all, they are offering free aerobic exercise to folks like “Dave.” And for confirmed couch potatoes, they are pointing out the advantages of remote-control televisions.

  Submitted by Tammy Madill of Millington, Tennessee.

  Thanks also to Joanne Walker of Ashland, Massachusetts.

  WHY IS THE NBA SHOT CLOCK 24 SECONDS?

  * * *

  During the 1953–1954 season, the National Basketball Association was beset by difficulties. Attendance was low; many franchises were in financial trouble.